Lately, the issue of Singaporeans not having enough babies have been in the news. And as a married woman and a mother, such news never fail to catch my attention. Let me just tell you, what may encourage ME, to have more kids.
Before I got married and have a kid, I always dream of having 4 kids. The more the merrier, was my philosophy. Especially since I grew up in a big family. The idea of having only 1 or 2 kids just seems so.... lonely. But of course, reality hits me in the face and I have to admit that THAT dream seems so silly and not to mention, scary, right now.
Oh yah, back to what will encourage ME (I really don't care about others) to reproduce and reproduce and reproduce:
1) Lower the price of housing:
Every young couple I know complain about the rocket high prices of housing in our cute, little country. How do you expect us to expand and have more kids when sometimes, the basic necessity of having a place to call home is not even possible? Shahreil and I had to go rounds after rounds of balloting for a new flat (since it is cheaper and more practical for us who has yet to have much ka-ching in the bank). How many times did we waste our $10 just to find out that we are the number 5234, queing for 230 units? Chet! In the end, we settled for a resale flat, which of course, wiped out our entire savings!
2) Lower the price of owning a car:
I know, I know.. we are encouraged to take public transport. But seriously, if you have kids in tow (especially small ones) you wouldnt want to spend your time running after packed buses or trains. Especially since my parents live at the other end of the island and and it is going to be a hassle if we have to keep taking public transport to get there. And not to mention the daily task of having to send and fetch our son to/fro my MIL's house daily. Take public transport? You want me to die of exhaustion, ah? SO, having a car is no longer a luxury, but a necessity. And having to spend so much monthly on the loan, the petrol, the parking charges... It's just a huge burden!
3) Make child care more affordable:
Let us be realistic here. Gone are the days where grandparents are the main caregiver for our children. They have a life of their own. And imagine if they have 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 grandchildren. How? Turn their house into childcare issit? So, young parents have no other options but to turn to these 2 alternatives: Maid or Childcare.
A) Maid:
I dont even want start on how SCARY it is for parents to have a total stranger look after their kids. Horror stories aside, I do not want my kids to spend half their day with a maid who doesnt do much in a child's development. I grew up with maids all my life and what did I get out of it? I became a dangdut fan. :-)
But most of us do not have much choice, do we? We end up turning to these maids to take our place at home, and the cost of having a maid... WAHLAO! Paying the poor things their deserved salary is fine by me... but the monthly levy? That's another issue altogether!
B) Childcare centres:
There's always the childcare centres, right? BUT... it's not that cheap too, despite the subsidy. And if you have more that 1 kid, nearly 1/3 of your pay goes to childcare!
So yeah... who looks after the child is one MAJOR headache! Of course, the ideal scenario is the MOTHER looks after the child. But with such high cost of living here, only the lucky ones get to do that. Mere mortals like the rest of us, HAVE to work.
Try living the life of the working -couple- with- no- maid. It's not easy. It's a struggle everyday. You go to work. Feels guilty not spending enough time with your child. Feels guilty not doing as much as you feel you should at work. Go home. Tired. Still must wash, clean, cook, look after child's needs. Feels guilty that you are trying to finish housework and NOT spend quality time bonding and developing your child. Feels guilty that you are not bringing work home. Feels guilty that you are not spending enough quality time with your spouse. Guilty that you are not looking after your spouse's need. Guilty that you are forever cranky and angry at your spouse. Tired. Go to sleep. Dream about work. Wake up feeling tired. And the cycle continues.
It's a guilt trip every freaking day!
Tell me then, why should I want more kids? If just with one, I feel guilty that he's not being taken care of as best as he should be... why should I multiply it by 2, 3, 4? Of course, I can give birth every single year... but any young couples with enough brains and sensibility wants a family life that has QUALITY! We want to ensure that our offsprings have the best that life has to offer and that means, the occasional family trips, the enrichment classes, the occasional treats to real good (expensive) food. And of course, parents who have the time to be WITH them and not slogging it out at work.
So yeah, tell me again.... Should I have lots of kids here? I don't think so.
(Not that I'm not grateful to all the baby bonuses and whatever incentives the top people are giving us, but seriously... it's not enough lah..)
Alright... the working woman has to get back to work.
No comments:
Post a Comment