MY LITTLE R

The suspense

I spent the last part of my pregnancy feeling terrified, anxious yet excited.
I really had no idea what to expect. I still didnt have a clue how's a contraction supposed to feel like! And will I know it when my waterbag burst? The books say that it can be a slight trickle or it can be a gush. But it my head, I imagined that it'd be like the one in Desperate Housewives. Her waterbag burst in the middle of a party and it's a lot, I tell you! I really was afraid I'd be caught in such a scene. And it occured to me (at the last moments) that I will be going into labour. After years of listening to all the horror stories, I will now be going through it and it freaked me out real bad. Poor Shahreil had to spend many nights comforting his tearful & terrified wife.


The labour
Did you know that Ryan came exactly on the day he was due?
He did! My boy really dengar the kata one. I really wanted him to come on the 16th. Reasons: (1) I wanted it to be an even number date (cos I like even numbers)
(2) I wanted it to be on a weekend cos Shahreil will be around.

Somehow in my heart, I just knew that he's going to pop out on the 16th.
So, I woke up on the Saturday morning and realised that my waterbag had burst. I wasnt sure, of cos. Asked Shahreil, who was clueless, of cos. Asked Mak, who wasnt sure as well. Decided that we should head off to the hospital anyway. Sempat posing2 lagik sebab belum rasa sakit. Was admitted at around 10.30am and the real pain came only around an hour later. But masa tu kira leh tahan lagik. By midday, I had requested for the gas to ease the pain whenever the contractions came and by 3 pm, I had to grip the bed like my life depended on it everytime its contraction time. Dr Wong came when I was 5 cm dilated and he advised me to take the epidural. I have been reading up about epidurals and I decided, what the heck..Tak yah jadik hero and teknologi dah ada untuk mudahkan hidup, amik jer! AFter the epidural, the pains were much much more bearable.

Shahreil was such a dear during the whole time. To tell you the truth, I thought he'd crack some inappropriate jokes which deserve a kick in the ass from me. But no! HE was such an excellent birth partner that day. Strong, dependable, supportive, full of love and empathy for me. Thank you.

I would have jumped up in joy, if only I could, when the nurse told me that I was fully dilated and ready to give birth. Like finally! I believe that was at about 8.45pm. After that it was all about breathing and pushing. Not an easy task, but I just wanted to get it all over and done with that I kept pushing and pushing and pushing. I swear that I didnt realise he's finally out. All of a sudden. Dr Wong threw this little wailing thing at me and I was like, WHAT?! He's OUT?! I really can't describe what I felt at that point of time.

There I was holding our son. The little living thing thats been moving about in me.
I have a son. My little Ryan Iskandar is finally in my arms.

3.380

syukur alhamdullilah. they say a picture says a thousand words. that's means this album has 34000 words.

Baby Ryan Iskandar

all three of us are healthy and ready to start a new beginning! once again, syukur alhamdullilah.

Mirror Mirror on the Wall

SO.. the question is.. Will he look more like me..? Or like him...?

I can't wait!

Tick..Tock...

In case anyone's wondering, NOPE, the baby has yet to pop out.
I'm not sure whether to feel glad or not.
There are times when I wish that he'd come out right now. Especially when the backaches hit me real bad. But there will be times when I wish he'd be in there forever so that I can still laugh (and grumble!) whenever he moves around. Oh! Plus the fact that the thought of going into labour is getting to be a little bit terrifying. YUP! I was at Thomson's labur ward on Tuesday for heartbeat monitoring when I heard this woman screaming. SCREAMING! Yikes!

I'm enjoying my closest version of living the life of a tai tai.
The only downside being that I'm under some sort of self-imposed house arrest. Yelah, kalau aku terberanak kat luar, siapa nak jawab?! Anyway, since I waddle like an oversized duck nowdays, I think being at home is way better. But I might just sneak out for a while tomorrow for some hair pampering. Plus, I can't wait to be able to go for my facials. I need my facials!!!! I miss my facials!!!

That's all folks.
I can't wait to hold the Little R in my arms!

You need to think about the future today. You are doing a great job of leaving the past behind and your mind is more concerned with palnning and ambition than anything else.

So, says my horoscope. And how very true!

Today's the day I have been waiting for gleefully for many months!

Last day of school for many months ahead... and in fact, come next year, I'll be off to another school.

How does that feel?

Not that good. I go around with a lump in my throat.

Basically, I hate farewells.

That's why I didnt go around saying my goodbyes to any of my colleagues just now.

Not that I wont be seeing them at all any more. I WILL be back for meetings in Nov anyway.

And I don't think I am able to do that without shedding a tear or two.

Of all the things I'll miss most, its the friends I've made over there.

The very people who's there to cheer you up when you are down, bitch about stuffs together until both of you feel better, dread the bell together, drag our feet to meetings together, and many many many more.

I will miss you guys.

Im going to miss the kids too.

The class that's forever giving me a headache (3NA) threw me a suprise party just now. Nurin baked me a superbly delicious chocolate coated cake ! I was so touched! And seeing her cry made me wanna cry. We have been together a lot. I've seen her grown from a paikia sec 1 to a fine young lady. And I'm glad I made a difference in her life. Whenever I feel jaded and disillusioned, I will remember her and know that I want and I can make a difference in someone's life. Anyways, for the rest of the kiddos, thanks for all the gifts and wishes. Precious!

SO now!

I will focus more on myself and the baby!

How exciting!