As Promised..

Here's the list of reflections that I promised, in case somebody thinks that I'm bedek-ing.

Let's start with the most boring part,
(1) WORK-WISE:
Hmmm.. I think I did quite well this year. I was heaped with lots and lots and lots of tasks which looked really daunting and scary to me. Things like organising school assembly programmes (2 of them!), ML Week, being i/c of this.. i/c of that..things that I initially thought I couldn't handle at all. But suprise, suprise.. I managed to handle those tasks pretty well and I'm totally proud of myself. I guess it's true..nobody really enters a job and immediately become an expert, you have to learn on the job and this year I did a lot of learning. I mean A LOT.

Areas of Improvement: I need to sign up for more courses (I think I was way short of the 100hr requirement this year. hehehhe..) and I'm definitely going for the work attachment thingy next year.

(2) RELATIONSHIP:
I don't know if my partner will agree to this, but I feel that this has been quite a rough year for us. Firstly, there were 2 rather serious break-ups and I'll take full responsibility for both of them. I really thought I had lost him during those 2 times, but I'm glad that here we are, stronger than ever. Second, I guess the fact that we have been in this limbo state for like way too long that I/we(?) began to get restless. I was so tired of being in a rship that doesnt seem to have any direction at all. But now we do. ;-P

I'm also quite pleased to note that we argue much lesser now. (agree?) For instance, previously..when we argue (over the phone), we'll slammed down the phone and then start hurling accusations and hurtful smses to one another. Its usually never-ending cos we'll feel hurt and we'll want to hurt the oter party even more by sending more hurtful smses. We just didn't want to lose. Now, we still slam down the phone and send 1 or 2 smses but thats it. We'll then cool down and then apologise and it's ok.

And after so many years, I began to learn that him being angry at me or scolding me or hurting me with words doesnt mean that he doesn't love me. I learn that he usually says mean things when he's angry but he doesnt mean it. He IS mean when he is pissed off. He ever called me a thick princess-thinking skull and that hurt like hell. But things like that don't bother me much anymore.

Gosh! I did learn a lot after nearly 7 years.

Areas of Improvement: Smile sweetly when he says that he's going to Alif. ;-P

(3) MONEY-WISE:
I haven't been saving as much as I'm supposed to simply because I couldnt see any reason to. I scrimp and save and in the end I had to take a huge portion out to lend this person and that person. Imagine the heartache when I had to take out 2K, and nope, I'm not even going to start thinking that I'm ever going to get that money back. But now, at least I have a purpose in saving. I have to save money for the wedding, and for a house. So, NOW, I WILL save.

Areas of Improvement: No more lending.

(4) Others:

Somewhere in the middle of the year, I agreed to sponsor my relative's education back in Indonesia. He's my second cousin (grandmommas are sisters, mothers are cousins). He was about to enrol to a uni in Pekan Baru when the person who has been sponsoring his education all this while decided to stop the funding. He was totally devastated and I really didn't want him to stop schooling because of that. It's very rare for people in that island to go that far in education. Most of them only finish secondary school. I thought Kamal (that's his name) has the drive and the potential to go further and it's a pity if he quit halfway cos of money. And it's not even much money. 50 bucks per mth to cover his fees, rent and daily expenses. And I'm not asking for anything in return, I'd be happy to see Kamal hold that cert someday. And hopefully he'll manage to help raise his family's standard of living somehow.

So, i guess.. I did quite ok this year huh. Hope next year will be better. I'll start thinking of my new year resolutions.

Bye Bye 2005

It's that time of the year again.
I know that most of us will start thinking of our new year resolutions, but I personally believe that before we come to that, we need to take some time to reflect on what we have done/ achieved/failed this year.

I'll think about it and tell you tomorrow. Promise.

I know I did the right thing. But it left a hollow feeling in my stomach.

........

Alif. Alif. Alif.

Happy Anniversary.

To be honest, I woke up with a dreadful feeling inside me.
I didn't know how I was going to go through the day.
But hey! It's all done.
A big thank you for:

a) My mom who was super excited and woke up real early in the morning to clean up the house (like it was Hari Raya!) and bought 2 vases of FRESH FLOWERS (can you believe that!).
b) My dad for trying so hard to keep cool although everyone knows that he's squealing with delight inside.
c) To Tok Aji, Nenek and Tok Ne whose very presence made a huge difference to me.
d) To Pak Long and Mak Long who not only came, but brought along 2 huge pots of mee briyani!Sedappppp...
e) To Cik Niah, without her, wé wld have been clueless in the kitchen.
f) To my sisters who provided me with the much needed encouragement, support and constant supply of crappy jokes. I wldnt have been able to go thru it without u babes!
g) And to my dearest mbak yu, who had to bear the brunt of it all when mummy was getting stressed up about the whole affair. Thank you mbak yu!

The biggest thank you goes to YOU. You know who you are.
It's the best anniversary present ever.

Happy 6yrs and 7 mths Anniversary!
I love you lots and lots and lots.
We are a step closer to fulfilling our dream.

I'm in love with this guy. For those who are clueless as to who the hell this gorgeous looking man is, let me introduce you to...(drumroll..) STEVEN SABADOS! (claps.. wolfwhistles)

He is super talented. I watched reruns after reruns of the Designer Guys just to ogle at him hard at work. He seems like the nice, husband material kind of guy who can magically turn anything and everything into some kind of ornament, furniture and so on.. And did I mention that he looks yummilicious? He is..

Ermm.. is that a wedding band around his finger? Damn!

Kampong Life

I watched Kampong Life (project pilot) just now.
It was really hilarious looking at those city kids sweating it out in a kampong.
They were armed with bottles after bottles of insect repellent.
Despite all the complains, I think they did enjoy the experience.
And I was totally amazed by the attitude of 2 of the kids, Clarissa and Wallace.
They were game for pretty much everything!
So proud of them!

And talking about kampong, I'm missing my kampong right now.
Yes, it's totally different from Singapore.
But I love it down there.
Simple and laid-back.

And the first thing I'll do when I get my pay on Dec 12, is to buy a ticket to my kampung.
Balik kampung..ohh..ohhh..ohhhh..balik kampung...

Baby

I just found out that a good friend of mine is 2 months pregnant.
Congratulations! I'm so happy for you and hubby.
Can't wait to see little Feema & Raime. ;-P

No Monday Blues for me!

Today, I'm really proud of myself.
Let's see the things that I've done in the past 2 hours or so.

1) Finally completed and submitted my work review.
I was supposed to submit it to my Reporting Officer last week, but I concluded that since he's going to be away in Taiwan, why bother? So, for the whole of last week, up to this morning, I had the EPMS in my head. The fact that I still have not submitted it prevented me from enjoying my holidays fully. But now that it's done, I feel way better. So, my dear Mr T, go through the EPMS and give me the work performance bonus that I totally deserve! ;-P

2) Cleaned up my desk at work.
I'm normally a neat person. My colleagues will normally come over to my desk and gush at how neat and cosy my work space is. But Term 4 had been one hectic period. Exams, activities, invigilations and bla bla bla.. that it was hard to actually make time to clean up my area. I ended up piling papers after papers after papers on my desk. It was totally messy. Today, I finally summoned enough courage and determination to actually go through the mess and discard all the useless items that I've accumulated for the past 1 year. And now, my desk is as clean as when I first came to this school. (3 cheers for yati!)

3) I went to gather ALL the textbooks that I need for next year. I will start planning my lessons today (hopefully) The best part about teaching is that I get to plan wonderful (to me that is) lessons for my kids. Hey, I do take pride in my lessons ok!

So, to sum it up. I've had a good day at work. Why does it seems that I enjoy being at work more when the kids and other teachers are not around? Hmm..

Lastly, whatever unhappiness I feel about the engagement, I keep telling myself, what the hell..the most important thing is that I'm going to marry my darling at the end of it. I'm not going to let those people ruin it!

Pulau Buru, Karimun Indonesia

I miss Buru. The smell of the sea, the sight of thousands of stars glowing in the dark sky, the lazing around by the beach sipping on the unbelievably cheap coconut juice, surrounded by the very people I miss right now.

Let's sing...

I still think the song ALHAMDULILLAH (malay version) is the most beautiful song ever.
I get goosebumps whenever I listen to that song.


Click here for the lyric:
http://www.iloveblue.com/lirik_lagu/print_lirik_lagu.php?jenis=liriklagu&pid=4690