Masa Itu Emas

Both the hubby and the baby are fast asleep right now.
*Phew*
Some quiet time for me. A luxury, really.
Of all the things I missed most from my single mingle days (other than my siblings and my parents and Tampines) is my own little space.
Sometimes I just go on and on and on with things that I forgot to stop and breathe. Just like on Saturday when my fitness instructor reminded me.."Don't forget to breathe.."
I guess now is the perfect time for me to crawl back into my own little world, before one of them wakes up and screams for my attention. (Oh yes! The hubby too!)

Any updates on my part?
Nothing really... everything's been the same. Same old same old, Shahreil would say.
Last week was pretty fun.. while accompanying my kiddos at Kallang, I managed to get myself a manicure and pedicure. Not that Im into the whole pedi and mani thingy. I've never even like having my nail polished. Inai yes. Nail polish, no. Plus the fact, my parents never approve of nail polish. We, the sisters, could do so many things, but polishing our nails or even keeping our nails long is a BIG NO! And ayah never says no that often, so when he does say no, we understood that he means business.

Weekend was spent at the best place in Singapore. Mana? Tampines lah. Those who disagree are just plain jealous of us, Tampinesians. Heheh... We fetched Ibu, Ikin and Aini who came back from Bandung. Ikin disappointed both me and Shahreil for not bringing back 2 big parcels tied with curly wurly ribbons. One with Ariel and one with Arina Mocca inside. Oh. You should be able to guess which is for who. Hey! I am fair alright! He can have his Arina if I get my Ariel. Ikin only brought back bad news that it's pretty confirmed that Ariel is with Luna Maya. What shocking news!(eyes rolling) Fine. She's gorgeous and waaaaayyyyyy better than Fasha Sandha (if rumours were true, which I strongly doubt so). If it was Sendat, I would have flown all the way to Bandung and knock Ariel on his dumb head! So, its pretty confirmed I will never ever get Ariel. (oppss..its been confirmed since like on 16.11.2007) Maybe I can name my next son Ariel or Nazril Irham?? It's definitely better than Kuswadichandra Kelana Putra right, yang?

Do you know that of late I HATE reading the newspapers? It's bad news every single day. Never mind the economic crisis. I hate reading the senseless murders, the abuse, the accidents and so on and on. And me being me, will be affected for days after reading the news. Argh.

Oh ok. I gtg now. The boy is starting to squirm. Better tepuk him before he really wakes.

Life Goals

I went to West Coast Plaza, (which was formerly known as Ginza Plaza) with Shahreil for lunch today. Shahreil insisted that we've been there before, donkey years ago, but for the life of me, I just can't seem to recall stepping into that place at all. And I'm not the one with the short term memory in this relationship!

I ended up buying 3 books for Ryan, and I had to use all my willpower not to purchase any of those cute little outfits for him. Takut beli mahal-mahal, dia tak muat pulak! I promise myself that I'd bring him there one of these days.

Of late, I've been doing a lot of thinking. Sort of re-evaluating my life. Where I am right now, where I want to be in the future, things like that. It is kind of hard because I really am quite confused as to what I want out of this pretty short life.

My career. I think, for so long I've been contented being where I've always been. My friends and I used to joke that we'd be pretty satisfied with being H.O.Ts (only for us, teachers, to know) at the workplace. And to be honest, my ambition since young was to be a housewife. Haahhaha... Banyak sangat main makcik-makcik kot! Me and Faheema used to sit at the NUS canteen wondering why we were there when all we want to do was to be the perfect wives/mothers. We were not one of those career-driven people I guess. But recently, I feel that I can achieve more what I have now if I put my heart on it. Maybe since having Ryan, I am more driven to be the best that I can be so that I can give him the best of everything. I dunno.

The horrible part is that, sometimes I feel that if I want to excel at work, I'd have to sacrifice my family time. I know some people at work who have such outstanding portfolios but just look at how miserable they are. A slave to their work. I dont want to be like that. I dunno!! Argh! Can I have the best of both worlds? We'll see.

Enough about that! HEYY!! I've got a pretty good idea on what to do for Ryan's birthday. I've sort of mentioned in to both Shahreil and Ikin (i think!) about it, and they kind of approve it. Hmmm... but a few things to considerlah..whether it is do-able etc etc... So, TUNNNNGGGGuuuuuu!!

Meanwhile, it's Friday tomorrow and Yati simply looooovvvvees Friday. Woohooo!!!

Dilemma of a Working Mother

Ryan at birth

I believe all working mothers are in a constant dilemma, torn between their jobs and staying at home to look after their children. I struggle with it myself every single day. Not a day pass by without me wondering if I am doing the right thing. If my decision to continue working will in any way affect his future..errmm..not that I have a choice to NOT work either.

There's this niggling little voice inside of you that says that you are being a bad mom by not being with him 24/7, not being the one to bathe him, feed him put him to bed day in day out. And I know that in future I will miss his first days at school because I will have to receive other others' kids for THEIR first days at school. I will most likely not be the one to see him to his nursery class door, or wait for him at the void deck when he step out of that small kindergarden van, or bring him to the library on weekdays, send him to various enrichment classes and so on and on and on.. Whenever I see mothers waiting at the void deck for their kids, I get real jealous. How lucky are these women, to see their kids grow up right under their nose? It sucks.

I keep telling myself, by working , my son will have a nice place to call home, can have good food to grow up healthy, all the right books and toys to grow up smart and have the occasional trips to see the world. I've seen how terrible it is for some of my kids at the workplace who can't afford vey basic stuffs like a haircut, bus fares, uniforms and even money to go see the doctor when they are sick. Ryan, I hope, will not have to go through any of that. So, mummy will have to keep working.

I don't really know how I've fared as a mother. I always question myself when I leave him in his bed 6.30am to leave for work, or when I'm at school till very late in the afternoon. But as long as he keeps smiling and laughing the way he always does, I think I am doing ok. A smiling baby is a happy baby right? And that's all that matters.

I love you, Ryan.
And you too, Ryan's abah!

Weekend Rush

As usual, my weekend was jam packed with so many activities.
The hubby and I were in a dilemma as to whether we should 'post' Ryan to the east on Friday.
As much as we neededhe break, we also couldn't bear to part with the handsome one. In fact, it just gets harder every week since he is getting cuter and cuter.
In the end, we agreed on sending him there, not wanting to risk the grandparents at Tampines coming all the way to BB to kidnap Ryan.
True enough, when we reached Tampines everyone there were in such low spirits as they thought Ryan wasn't coming after all.

Off we went to Kg Glam to meet the others.
Yg ni biasalah, talk crap over a cup of teh.

The next day, we met someone so very brilliant.
Yasmin Ahmad!

She was at the screening of Muallaf at Causeway Point.

I've always enjoyed Yasmin's movies. They are all so simple yet so meaningful. Her movies are usually so beautifully made and I am always so amazed by her intelligence. Just read her blog (www.yasminthefilmmaker.blogspot.com) and you will know what I mean. I just don't understand why Malaysians are not that receptive to her films. She is such a gem!

Back to Muallaf... honestly, I didn't like it as much as Mukhsin. Not that there was anything wrong with the movie, but somehow Mukhsin was better. Maybe the subject matter in Mukhsin was lighter and closer to heart.. I just couldn't identify with the characters in Muallaf, though Sharifah Amani and her sister were so cute together and reminds me of Amira and myself.

Well, do watch Muallaf. And any other Yasmin Ahmad's movie. Tak rugilah...

The next day we went to Bottle Tree Village to celebrate Mak's birthday. Yang ke berapa? Well, I did ask Shahreil, but he doesn't know. Bertuah punya anak! Kalau Ryan tak tau umur aku brape, aku jotos kepala dia!

The place was pretty, though we didnt really get to jalan2 there cos we were rushing to fetch Ryan after that.

Now, I will present to you what we had last night.. Jangan jeles eh...

First up, the squid.. It looked good and taste even better. Rasa masam2 sikit, syiokkk.

Next up is the Hotplate Beancurd. Tengo tu, tak sama kan ngan yang biasa. DIa pakai tahu biasa jer... But it was suorisingly rather nice. I like the gravy.

Yang ini saya tak sentuh pun. I am ok with fish. It's just that I don't believe in eating a fish which I can clearly see its face like that. Macam sadistic kan!!!

Sayur my favourite. Kalau tak ada lauk lain, ada sayur aja pun best.

Apatah lagi kailan macam ni! Sedapnyer.. I think I liked this dish the best last night. I could actually smell the belacan + chilli when they place the dish in front of me.

The pineapple rice we had was also very nice. Ni tak sempat nak amik gambar orang dah senduk nasi dulu...

UDANG!!!!!! UDANG!!!! UDANG!!!!!! I am a sucker for udang, especially udang yang besar macam ni. Kalau udang kan, dengan kulit2 dia, ngan kepala2 dia aku bedal! And the udang yesterday was superbly delicious!

Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa... yang ni aku dah mengidam selama berminggu minggu, ever since I read Ida's and Ifah's blog. It was nice, of course.. the crab was so berisi. Not that I chose the crab myself. They did bring the live crab to the table, but I quickly looked away. Kalau dah ternampak the crab alive and kicking, I will never ever ever EVER eat it. Kan sadistic jugak tu! The dish was sedap but I'd prefer if it was a little spicy.

So, apa lagi? Pegi lah singgah kat Bottle Tree Village!

Happy Birthday Ibu!

My handsome son was all smart and handsome last Thursday to celebrate his nenek's 55th birthday. This was definitely the most challenging birthday celebration ever! Semua yang di plan hampir2 tak menjadi..



The cupcakes from Perfect Frosting which was to be delivered to her workplace last2 kena hanter kat rumah sebab birthday girl tak kerja. Tengok tu! On leave tak bilang kita! Dah lah tu...dok rumah tak tau nak duduk diam2...dia masak macam nak kenduri!! ISHHHH!! Padahal kitorang dah buat reservations tau kat Seoul Garden to suprise her. Selamat ada ramai spy kat rumah... Mbak yu yang kejap2 eksen gi kedai just to kol Ikin and Aini yang kept smsing me to update stuffs.



Tapi oklah, the suprise went well I guess. Bolehlah tahan..



So, there we were at Seoul Garden. I was initially afraid it'd be difficult to concentrate on cooking with Ryan at my side. But it was suprisingly ok... Dah besar lah katakan eh... Oh..and of course, I had nannies who practically lined up to look after him.


Starting with...you-know-who! Ayah was obviously desperate for Ryan to stay over night at Tampines that he asked everyone if they'd be at home the next day. Padahal budak tu will be sleeping over the next day tau.

The most beautiful 55 year old woman I've ever seen.

I was also happy that I finally got to bring daddy to eat at Seoul Garden. He deserves to enjoy good food bought by his kids after years of toiling for us. Do you know that till now, whenever we go out to eat, he will refuse to order anything and want to eat our leftovers cos he is afraid that it's going to be too expensive and we'd be unable to pay the bill?! Ayah..ayah...

So, that's about it. Happy Birthday Ibu! Stay vogue and happy! Love you!