Its back to Sunday

It's positive. Im suffering from Sunday blues. I think that is far worse than the Monday blues. At least, those people who suffer from Monday blues are still able to enjoy their Sundays. Not me. Come Sunday, Í'm a total bitch. I am still a bitch right now, because it IS still Sunday. That is bad, as effectively, my weekend is limited to Saturday. Am i making sense here? Well, who cares. It makes sense to me.'

Anyway, how was my weekend? Saturday was good. I had fun with my beloved girlfriend, Faheema. Love her to bits. Whenever i'm with her, i'm happy. She cracks me up and the best part is of course when we get to gossip. Hahahah... Plus, I can be myself when I'm with her. Not like with some of my other friends. It's hard to be myself when I'm around them. I always feel like I have to watch how i behave..what i say and all that. Always worry whether my clothes too tight, my sleeves too short, my language too vulgar, my make-up too thick.. that kind of thing. Gets very stressed up and all jittery when i'm with them. With Faheema, anything goes... I can let my hair down and just talk crap all day long.

Today's not so good. Mainly because it's sunday. I have to start my most hated ritual.. setting the stupid alarm to 5.15 am. Never mind.. I have another 1 hour or so before i do that.

I'm confused. How can you love someone so much that it hurts. Love is supposed to be a feel-good thing. But how come it hurts. How is it, we are able to love someone so much that just the thought of meeting him will give us the strength to go through the otherwise awful day, YET at the same time, we hate the sight of the person so much that we have this strong desire to punch him in the face. Heheh.. i realli feel like punching him sometimes. I always do the Ally McBeal thing in my head...

But, i also learn (after 6 yrs) that love and relationship takes a lot of hard work. I'm pretty sure what i have with him is true love. (ewww..) But it is true. I mean, this HAS got to be IT. We hurt each other mentally and emotionally all the time, but then it doesnt matter cause at the end of the day, we know that we really do love each other. And we know that we will never ever be happier with another person. And that we really would like to grow old together. And hopefully, we'll still be very much in love then. And that we still want to hold each other's hands and steal kisses every now and then.

I love you, my dear.