Late December = Staff Meeting = New Timetable + New Form Class + New Workload = Anxiety Attacks + Nightmares + Headaches = CRANKY BITCH.

It's ok.
Im not going to let this spoil my holiday (whatever left of it)
Im looking forward to celebrate Raya @ my favourite place in the whole wide world...with my favourite people.
And For the first time in my life I will celebrate New Year there.
Best kan...

Anyways.. Azam Tahun Baru Kali ini, very simple.

I want to be a better person.
For my own sake, and for the sake of the people that I love but sometimes take for granted.

Back to Work

I'm at work.
After more than a month! Woohooo...
I can't believe I was away from this place THAT long.
But I can't say i'm not happy being back here either..
I've missed my workspace (thou it's in desperate need for a spruce up, my classroom, my collegues, even the aunties and uncles in blue (the cleaners)

Ok, I can't afford to blog much right now.
4 huge files staring at me. I have to start my lesson plans for CME/PCCG.
Mak oiii.... macam mana nak abis dlm satu hari ni??
Level Coordinator waklu..more like Level Babu. Hahahha..
Tapi takpe, dah lama tak buat lesson plan...macam rindu pulak.
(gatal betollah ko yati!)

Kepada sayangkuz.. Selamat Anniversary yang ke... errmm...let me think for a while.. hehhehe... 7 and half years! Gua cintan sama lu many many!

The gals who made the days @ HTA bearable. The chic inspectors of 62nd OBTC.

Batam trip was ok.
Little disappointments here and there due to a few unexpected stuffs, but I guess, I have to make the best out of everything.

Going for spa @ Mustika Ratu was a totally new experience for me.
I felt totally like a pampered princess, having someone to massage, scrub, and bathe (yes! bathe!), and towel-dry me.
I felt like a chicken.. dikukus, direbus and akhirnya dipanggang.
I felt like a victim, groped here and there.
I felt like a porn star, prancing around naked infront of strangers like its nobody's business.
But I came out of the place, 3 hours later feeling extremely refreshed.
And all these for onli $58.

Today's Monday..4 and half more days to the end of my OBTC.
And I hate to admit this, but I do enjoy my course.
I threw tantrums, had terrible mood swings, cried, and back to throwing tantrums before I started the course.
It felt super terrible because I was forced to be in something I thought wasnt suitable enough for me.
Im a dancing kind of girl...what in the world would I want to be in NPCC?
I felt trapped.
With much dread (and hatred for the person who forced me), i went for my course.
I ended up enjoying myself.
I made really good frens, did things that reminded me of my sec/jc days (kayaking, pitch tents, obstacle course, abseiling), did things that I never thought I would do(rock-climbing, flying fox, revolver shooting).

So, yeah..Shahreil can go on and say.."I told you.."
I am enjoying myself.

Housing estet yang baru2 ni pelik sikit eh?
Yelah, terlampau banyak palang2/tembok2 kat kolong blok.
I've sort of lost my way too many times @ Sengkang/Punggol.
Way to many times I've had to walk in circles just because my path from spot A to spot B is ridiculously blocked by a tembok. Stupid kan. (NOT me. The tembok that doesnt seem to have any business over there)
And of course, the too many temboks kadang2 quite menyeramkan cos we never know who might jump on us.

Enough about the tembok. Tak boleh komplen banyak2, nanti Shahreil ada lebih banyak alasan untuk tidak tidak beli rumah di Punggol.

Yesterday, was the penutup for jalan raya.
Me n my dunman frens.
Shahreil tak ikut. Boring tau. Now I know how Adik felt when her abang tak ikut all those years while the rest of us berkepit ngan partner masing2.
Tapi tak apa... I was busy playing mummy to anak2 Ryz n Ajai.
Penat gak beb melayan karenah budak2 tu.
Hyper.
Tahun ni ada 'member' baru. Boypren Yan. Biasalah, kalau dah orang baru..mesti kena sakat habis2 ngan Ryzal.

Lagik..dua jam, I can go home. Yippee...

Our first year beraya as Anangs.. Heheheh..

Hey, guess what I did today??
I went marketing.. with Shahreil!
Best tau.
He came to my house at 9am and off we go to pasar..
with Shahreil pushing the trolley.

Anyways, while chatting with Ikin and Mummy yesterday, Ikin suddenly said,
"In 1 year.. you'll be married, and we cant do this anymore.."
Scary.
All the things Im used to in my life.
Sitting around after dinner talking non-stop with my sisters n mom.
Sleeping in my room.
Kissing Mahathir gd nite.
Tucking Amira to bed. This might sound weird, considering she's already 12 years old. But I've been doing that for nearly 12 years! I will cover her with a blanket. Kiss her on both cheeks and she'll do the same to me..hug her and say "Good Nite, mummy. Ok.. another weird thing, I call her mummy. Dunno why also. Even when Im off to camps or holidays, Amira will call me just to say good night. Gosh..Im so going to miss her.

Sometimes I feel its unfair that I am the one who has to get used to new things.
Change school, move to the west side, stay in his house bla..bla bla..
Why am I making all the sacrifices??? WHY ME?!!!
Arghhhhh....

Im getting cold feet.

Congrats to my boy, who finally got promoted to Sec 3.
It felt really good to see both of them (the boy + the dad) smiling so proudly.
Most of the time when I see the father, I had nothing but bad news... skipping class, skipping lessons, late..bla bla.. Takpenah yang happy. It's not something that I enjoy doing, you know.

Shahreil says that I shouldnt care too much about them.
But I cant help it.
Especially for those in my form class.
For one whole year, Im like a mother to them.
Macam emak kucing jaga anak2 kucing dia.
I know everything about them.
Family, financial state of the family, emak siapa ada affair, bapak siapa baru kena buang keje, kakak siapa lari rumah...
Everything they do inside or outside school will come back to me.
I'm the nurse when they injure themselves during PE.
I'm the aunt aggie when they break up.
I'm the mak tiri when they cabut kelas..
So, obviously, after a while.. I really feel for them.
Rasa bangga teramat sangat masa nampak Ivan first time baca pledge atas stage, bila Zulaiha broke records during Sports Day, bila my darling Thai boy Memutti masuk finals Nike Joga, bila Berdine improved her 2nd semester results, bila other teachers come to me once in a while to praise my kids. Hahah.. Macam mak2 kan?
Semalam, masa jalan kat Plaza Sing, I saw Muhaimin workig @ Golden V. My heart was filled with pride when i saw my boy looking so smart and so adult. Hahah...

So..yup...
One of the perks bila jadik cikgu.
You get to see boys and girls turn into young adults.
And you know that you are part of that process.
And hope that somehow you did make a difference in their life. Big or small.

Most asked question for Lebaran 2002-2003-2004-2005:
"Ati, bila nak makan nasi minyak"?

Most asked question for Lebaran 2006:
"Ati, kenapa tak bawak tunangnya?"
(Macamlah Shahreil tu takder famili sendiri nak beraya..apa punya questionlah.. Kalau raya ke-4, ke-5....okaylah, masih leh understand, tapi 1st day raya wak!! Giler ke??)

Anticipated questions untuk Lebaran2 yang akan datang..
"Ati, bila nak ada rumah sendiri?"
"Ati, bila nak ada baby?"
"Ati, bila nak ada baby no-2?"
"Ati, bila nak ada baby no-3. n0-4, n0-5, n0-6...?"
"Ati, bila nak terima menantu?"
"Ati, bila Shahreil nak pencen?"
"Ati, masa bulan posa, aku nampak Shahreil kat Tg Pinang berkepit ngan cewe' sana. Bila dia kawin lagi?"

Never ending ler gamaknya...
Tapi, aku akan tetap tersenyum dan layan jer lah...

Im in school..thinking..bestnyer yang lain2 suma tgh tido kat rumah.
Jealous tau. Ibu cuti 1 week, ayah ntah brape hari, Mirrah cuti sampai thurs (skola madrasah kan...). Mahathir ada Deepavali hol, Aini holiday sendiri, Ikin cuti, Diyana ntah eh..skola kot..tapi rasa2 mesti cabut gak. Aku jer lah yang pagi2 dah tercongok depan laptop ni. Selamat niari memang takde keje pun. Duduk jelah sampai jam 2 nanti.

Raya semalam biasa jerlah...1st day katakan, cuma go rumah Tok Aji & Tok Ne (bagi yg tak tahu..Tok Ne means Tok Betina)Ntah kenapa tahun ni I didnt makan muntah kedarah..rilek jer..bukan nak berdiet eh...first day raya memang tak pernah pikir pasal diet pon..tapi tak tau asal..lepas rumah tok aji jer...perut dahh penuh. Rumah tok ne, walaupun sambal goreng cik niah adalah sambal goreng the best in the world...tak larat nak masuk lagik.

Eh, tahun ini I got $14 tau duit raya..kira ada up sikit. Last year dapat $9 jer.. Oklah....dah tua2 bangka macam ni masih dapat duit raya. Hehehhe...

Cant wait for Sat & Sun...baru dapat jalan sepuas2 nya... naik van lagi...kalau mcm smlm naik bas ada lemau sikit.. tak kuasa ler nak kejar2 bas ngan high heels..hilang glam aku..

Ok ..tu aja..
Selamat Hari Raya semua..

My little bro got whacked by my mum last night.
A well-deserved one.
But it still hurts me to see him being beaten like that.
Especially so when he started to call out to me for help.
And he just had to add the part that went something like,
"Kak Long..tolong Mahathir. Tadikan Mahathir tolong Kak Long".
That really did it for me. I was this close to intervening, but I had to stop myself because I really do not wish for him to be Anakku Sazali.

I love you, my dearest Abang.
I'm sorry I couldnt help you yesterday.
I want you to grow up to be a nice young man, not some stubborn, uncouth, impossibly spoilt brat that you are turning into.

Ermm.. I really have nothing to say.
I'm here because Shahreil asked me to write an entry.
Why? You see, I'm @ his house.. and I believe he just wants to keep me occupied for another 10 minutes so he can finish watching football. That cunning wolf!

I buka-ed @ his house again. Very last minute kind of thingy. I'm suprised that his mom actually cooked sambal sardin. My fav. ANd all tis while I thought sambal is like a banned dish in his house. I've always worried how Im supposed to survive in a house that doesnt have sambal when I get married to him next year. Rupanyer..HANYA SHAHREIL yang mengada2. Hahha.. And the sambal was nice too, macam sambal yang tok ne masak. Best.

Shahreil is beside me right now, vetting what Im typing. Who cares..I'll blog whatever I want to blog. Oit! Gi siap ah! I want to go shopping.

Im done with marking exam papers. Yippeee!!
Sometimes I wonder if they even listen to what I'm saying in class cos its the same mistakes over and over and over again.
Suka hati korang lah.. Malas nak membebel lagik.

Hey, I'm looking forward to the holidays (as long as I dun think abt the 3 weeks NPCC training course).
Things I'd like to do during the hols (Cehhh..siang2 dah berangan)

a) Sleep
b) Watch dvds after dvds after dvds
c) Cook and cook and cook
d) Go rumah tok ne more often
e) Read
f) Go Buru
g) Go for a short trip to i-dunno-where-yet

Tak sabarnyer aku!!

So many things to do...so little time

I am surrounded by men suffering from mid-life crisis.
So, I decided to read up a little on it, hoping that somehow i'd be enlightened as to why they are behaving stupidly/horribly/idiotically.

HIS Midlife Crisis! Will Your Relationship Survive?by Pat Gaudette, founder of The Midlife Club

You are in a committed relationship, married or involved on an exclusive basis. You thought everything was glorious. Or, at least as glorious as it gets—all relationships have some rough spots.

It seems that you are always fighting. Or he just doesn't act like himself anymore. He wants to sell the house and get a little place in the mountains or a sailboat and sail to the islands. . He doesn't like being home. He changes his hair style, starts a diet and joins the local gym. He says his clothes are too old for him. He says you and he have grown apart. He needs time to think about 'things.' He wants space. He wants something but he doesn't know what. He wants a divorce.

If he's between the ages of 40 and 60 (give or take a few years), your man is blazing a trail through male midlife — he's having a crisis.

We're not talking about the man who has always been a womanizer, a schemer or generally not the nicest person in the world. We are talking about the man who has up to this point assumed responsibility and been the person you could depend upon in time of need.

What you must keep in mind is that he really doesn't understand what he's doing, he isn't deliberately hurting you he just knows that something is wrong in his life and he's searching for the answers.

You see, men don't plan on turning unpredictable. It happens when they look in the mirror or in the eyes of their grandchildren and see themselves as old men. They have, up to this point, believed they were 25-year-old boys.

Male midlife crisis devours relationships. It may be devouring yours. What you must understand and believe is that no matter what you do, or don't do, the outcome will be the same. You do not have control over him, only yourself.

He's in an emotional storm that will test the patience and endurance of all those who love him as he comes to grips with the fact that he is no longer 25. He will hurt you. He doesn't mean to hurt you, but he will hurt you

It's a punch right between the eyes when he suddenly realizes that he is getting older. There's so much he hasn't done. Time is running out. He can't keep up this stress of being husband, father, breadwinner! He's getting older — his hair is thinning, his waist is thickening, his muscles are flabby, his face is wrinkling, he has a t-shirt with little hand prints and 'we love you, gramps' in childish scrawl. He is feeling emotions he's never felt before. And occasionally he is impotent. It's just too much!! He can't handle it! He doesn't want to be an old man!! Sometimes referred to as 'male menopause,' male midlife crisis is not nice for any of the players involved. It is difficult to say who hurts more, him or you.

There's not much you can do to speed up his passage through this crisis in your lives. He probably doesn't want to talk about it, at least not to you. He may believe that you're the whole reason he feels the way he does. It's not true.

You need to understand that this is his problem, it will have to be his solution—what he's going through is normal and you are not responsible. You can't change it or fix it because you didn't break it.

You will have to step back and let him whirl around in his search to find himself. He has a need to blame someone for the bad feelings he has, for the terrible way he's acting, for the lousy way he feels. Don't believe it if he says everything wrong in his life is because of you. And don't try to explain his feelings to him because you can't and he won't listen.

What Can You Do?

Now is the time you must develop yourself as an independent person. You must take responsibility for yourself and your happiness without depending on him for the closeness and intimacy that he probably is unable to give right now. Plan things without him. Depend upon yourself, not him. Allow him to do the same.

If you make the decision to demand that he straighten up, to demand that he stop his erratic behavior, to demand that he return to the person you're most comfortable with, you'll be making a mistake.

If you make the decision to nag and whine, you'll be making a mistake.

If you think you can make the choices for him or tell him what he should do to feel better or get his life in order, you'll be making a mistake.

If you make idle threats about what you will do if he doesn't change, you'll be making a mistake

As hard as it may be to stand back and watch him self-destruct, that is the role you will have to take. Your number one priority as he whirls through his midlife crisis should be you and your needs. You must protect yourself. Your beliefs will be tested, your faith will be stretched, your love will be bruised and perhaps torn beyond repair.

Coping with male midlife crisis is not easy. Not every relationship will survive the strain.

After eating the Kheema(keema? qeema??) Daging that I cooked yesterday, mummy declared that I can now get married. heheh.. Sedap lah tu.. Terrer jugak aku ni.
Not that it makes any difference cause the hubby-to-be doesnt like most of the things that i like to eat/cook. Nasib..nasib...

Talking about food, I'm now at the staff room staring at 2 tupperwares of food. One mee goreng and one nasi goreng. Proudly presented to me by my Sec 1 boys. They cooked it during Homec class. Best gak jadik cikgu ni eh, selalu dapat makan free macam ni. Last week it was cookies and the week before apple pies.. Yummmm yummm..

Ok, tu jer nak ckp. Back to my marking. It took me 1 hour to go through 24 kefahamans.. macam mana nak habis, buat keje depan laptop..heheh.. Go yati go...lagi 4 buku jer ni...

I'm a contented woman today.
Why? Sebab, setelah berhari-hari mengidam nak makan laksa,
I finally got to eat a bowl of laksa @ Bugis yesterday.
Thanks to my dear Shahreil.

Help!!
I'm getting old.My bones are getting brittle.
I've been going around with this really bad pain around my knee area.
Macam nenek2 sey.... It's something I thought I'd get when I'm my mum's age.
NOT when I'm 26!
26 is when I'm supposed to be running around full of life and energy, but just look at me now... damn!
I'm 26-going-62!
I feel 62.
Arggggggghhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!

I'm feeling super duper good today, considering its a Sunday and usually I have the Sunday blues. But it's still too early to tell. I might get it somewhere later in the afternoon, when I realise that its going to be Monday soon.

But NOW, I feel GOOD..
I guess a little bit of pampering yesterday helps.
After so many months, I finally went for my much-needed hair treatment.
I think its been quite sometime since I last pampered my hair.
Lack of time and energy mostly.
But I decided yesterday, I HAVE to go and pamper myself!
And yup, 2 hours of absolute pampering.
Nice place.
For your info, I dun go to those high end salons.. membazir aja.
I love my neighbourhood salons better.
Better service, they know you by name, and the person sitting next to you is not some snobby tai tai with her designer stuffs, but some friendly-looking auntie.
Not to mention, the price is way cheaper.

And I went for a small shopping spree last week with the beloved.
Shopping sprees are very rare nowdays you know.
Ikin even said that I''m getting to be such a boring shopper.
I dont splurge like I did last time.
80% of the time I'll place the items back on the shelf.
Hey! I'm no Siti Nurhaliza who has people sponsoring her wedding.
I need to SAVE.
So everytime I go shopping, I'm doing all these maths thingies inside my head.

Ermmm, what else is making me happy today?
Oh yeah..I cleaned the whole house today.
Cleaning has this therapeutic effect on me. (spelling btol tak?)
Thats why even when I'm tired from work, among the first thing I do when I get home is to scrub the toilet floor. Hahahha.. Crazy.
But I love it when the house looks and smells sooo clean. Best tau.
I think I'll make a perfect housewife. Hahhah.. (Hint Hint to Mr Hubby-to-be)

Mummy is cooking today. Yeahhhhh...
Im sick of eating my own cooking.
'Dun get me wrong, My cooking is ok ok..
But nothing beats mum's cooking rite?

Ok, thats all..
Looking forward to:
1) My prebet tiot's bday celebration. (another xcuse for a cousins gathering)
2) Teachers Day dinner at Smiling Orchird
3) Teachers Day celebrations ( yippieee! Dapat prezens)

I worry easily nowdays.
Not just for myself, but for others as well.
I worry about Shahreil riding his bike all the time.
I worry about my grandparents' well-being.
I just realised how old and fragile they are.
Especially Tok Aji whom my mum mentioned, is dying.
Scary.
And I worry everytime my dad coughs or starts wheezing.
Especially since he is one stubborn man who refuses to stop smoking despite already experiencing 2 heart-attacks.
And I start thinking whether I've done enough for them. Or whether they know that I love them even though I do not express it openly enough.
And I start thinking what I should start doing to express my love for them.
I havent even had the time and energy to visit my grandparents lately. Gone were the days when i'd make my way to Tok Ne's house in the afternoon. Now, by the time I finish work, I'd be too tired.
And whatever communication I have with my dad is Hi Hi Bye Bye.
Our long working hours preventing us to do more than that.
Sometimes I miss those days where he'd bring us all to eat outside or the times when he'd cook for us. Now, he seems so far away..
Whatever free time he has, he'll either go to masjid or kedai kopi or Buru.
It's kind of frustrating sometimes.

Ok, tukar topik sikit.
Yesterday, masa takde kerja..(yeah rite) tangan gatal pegi bukak diari lama.
It was hilarious reading all those old entries, especially those about Shahreil.
Masa zaman2 belum matair and baru-baru matair.
I kept calling him up in the middle of reading the journal, to say things like
"Oit! You didnt pay for my food on our first date!"
"Yaaanngg... you sang for Normalah first @1.05am then you sang for me @1.11am. Me second choice eh???!"
Hhahha..
And I miss those days. Sometimes I think I forgot how much we are in love with each other. And how badly I wanted him last time and the things I had to go through to get him. Hahah.. Yup, I was that crazy over him.. Oppss..salah..still AM crazy about him.
Thou I'm a cranky biatch now.
I still am in love with you, Shahreil Bakri.

Ooops..sebelum terlupa, here's wishing my dearest daddy a Happy 54th Birthday!
He's the most hardworking man I've ever known.
He goes out to work @ 5.30am.. and reaches home only @ 10++ pm. I'm totally glad that's becoming less and less frequent. A man his age and condition shouldnt be working so hard.

Once again, Happy Birthday and hope to be celebrating many more of your birthdays in years to come.
We love you daddy!

The negativity in me is slowly creeping back.
I've got to fight it.
For my own sake and for the sake of others around me.

Work is piling.
I think this has been my busiest term ever!
The nightmares back.
The migranes here to stay.
I think I'm getting deaf. (as a result of being around too many shrieking hyperactive teenagers)
I get irritated easily.
I'm cranky 95% of the time.
I'm in the danger of bursting into tears anytime.
I'm afraid I'll just cave in under all these burden that has been heaped on me.

But Shahreil is always telling me to look on the brighter side of things.
So yeah, I guess I'm lucky enough to get the job that I've always wanted.
And I do love being surrounded by these young people.




My Darlings from 2N4. The whole lot of them during the last day of our camp. My Little Sunshines..

I have this tinge of sadness inside me. but I have no idea why.
Maybe its because the camp has ended( I always get sad after a good camp), maybe its because Mbakyu is going home Friday. (I always get sad when my maids leave).
Or maybe, I'm just a sad sad person.

The Excel Fest is finally over. *phew*
What a relief.
One thing off the list. NO. Make it two. The Racial Harmony assembly prog is cancelled. Another *phew*

I met 2 really ugly Singaporeans yesterday:
a) 1 involves a petty teacher who complained about fans. Yup. Fans.
I can't believe she's a teacher. What kind of values does she impart to her
small little students? but nvm, at least she adds a little drama to our
otherwise boring booth-watching day at the excel fest.
b) The other Singaporean is no better. I was standing at the school gate waiting for Ikin, when I saw this guy stopped behind me. I thought he was the owner of one of the many bicycles parked there, so I moved too give him way. Imagine my suprise, no, suprise is a nice word.. ermm..horror..when I saw him placing a used ice cream cup in the basket of one of the bicycles. I was so appalled! Disgusted.

Apalah dalam kepala otak dorang2 ni?

This entry is dedicated to a special someone who has always been there for me when I need him most.

He was there to help me complete my web design assignment when I was in NUS. (till now, I know nuts about web design)
He was there when I needed someone to chauffer me all the way from NIE to Bedok Library when I needed to complete my project.
He was there to help me film a short video for my NIE presentation.
He was there to help me with all the multimedia stuffs that I needed to impress my supervisor during my teaching practicum.
He was always there when my computer cock up on me.
He ever rode all the way tp Punggol during his lunch time to fetch and then send me to Yishun, knowing that I would not make it one time if I were to take the bus.
ANd today, once again..he was there for me when I'm desperately in need of help with my MOE Excel Fest items.

No words can describe how grateful I am.
I feel absolutely blessed for I know he will always be there.
And just that thought makes me stronger.

I believe I'm 2 kg heavier today.
I always get fatter during the weekends.. and I have to work my ass out to lose the weight that I gained during the weekends, only to gain it back again when weekends come and so it goes on and on and on.
The reason I eat so much during weekend is the fact that thats the time that my mum cooks for the family.
And when she cooks, its always a feast.
We had wanton noodle for lunch, and as most of you know, I love noodles.
And for dinner, she whipped up another feast.
Nasi minyak! With the daging korma and the sambal udang and the paceri nenas.
Of course I had more than 1 serving.
Now I'm totally full.

Talking about food, I think me and the future hubby will have lots of problems regarding our meals when we get married.
You see.. both of us have very different tastes when it comes to food.
Actually, he is the ngengada one.
Ini tak suka, itu tak makan.
Unlike me, I eat practically everything. Tak cerewet lah beb.
But most of the food that I like, he thinks weird.
I love my veggies..all kinds. Petai and jering included.
Him. I spent 10 minutes yesterday, coaxing and forcing and back to coaxing him to try eating 1 small tiny weeny broccoli..which he refused, of course.
I love my tomatoes.. every dish I cook, i try to put in tomatoes, and he hates it.
I love seafood..kerang, remis, kepah, kupang, siput..
And he thinks I eat weird food like sambal tomat and sambal lonteh(ok, this sounds weird, I know)
And I cant survive not eating sambal. He hates food which are red in colour.
I think, we are definitely in trouble.

I think I'm addicted to Shahreil.

One week into work and my migrane is back.
I think its migrane..or what my dear dr cheung call stress-headache.
Yup, I'm stressed.
Only 1 week. 9 more weeks to go, Yati.
It's ok. Shahreil told me to tackle one task at a time.
So, I've already done the Youth Day concert rehearsal this morning. (Me n Geok Eng are i/ç of this AGAIN!)
I will prepare the ML Common Test THIS WEEKEND.
I will have to start thinking abt the TLLM booth for the EXCEL fest this Fri n Sat.
Then there's the SEc 2 camp..
And the N Level Oral..
And the Racial HArmony concert in 3 weeks time. (apa? muka aku ni muka concert ke??)
And of course, the I LOVE PUNGGOL Carnival + Speech Day on 8th August.

Stressed beb, tapi mcam exciting pun ada gak.
ANd the fact that I know all the other teachers are as busy and stressed up as I am.
I get to bitch about the workload with my teacher-frens on msn... and in the staff lounge.
And it makes me feel better.
A little sadistic, I know.

But I still want this headache to go away.
Its making me cranky everyday.
Its making me too sick to do anything except jump onto the bed.
I slept @ 8pm yesterday! Can you imagine.. 8!

In the meantime, I will enjoy my saturday.
Anyone want to go Batam tmr?? I miss my choconutz.

bintang di syurga

Video klip paling best from Peterpan. Sexynyer ariel.. *drool*

Another birthday.
A year older.
Can't believe I'm actually 26.
What the heck, I still feel 18 anyway.
I think I stopped growing at 18.

Anyways, thanks to those who remember my birthday.
Got smses/calls from people near and far. From people I havent heard of in months.
Cousins in JB, msn fren in KL, sedaras frm Indo.. mcm best kan.
Internasional.

My darling bought me the Zara top that I've been eyeing, but me being the cheapskate that I am, thought was too ridiculously expensive to even consider buying. And I love the robinson voucher (jom gi shopping niari?) and the muddy mud pie..
And I absolutely love the Sheer Romance stuffs Ikin got for me.
The maroon nightie and the tankiny-- I Like..
And the Vanilla facial mask frm mummy.
And the table clock frm Mahathir.

*sigh*
Now its back to reality.
The party's over.
Bsok dah keje.
Niari nak kena plan lesson.
Kan dah depressed balik.
Dah start sakit kepala.
Dah start mimpi pasal skola.
DAh start boring2.
Hahahha...

Takpe. Tu bsok. Niari masih boleh enjoy.
And look forward to next monday, cos it's youth day holiday.
Hahahha.. best jugak jadil cikgu ni eh.

Last week it was Peterpan Galore!
Kalau orang lain tengah demam bola, Yati was having her own demam Peterpan.
And what a week it was! Full of extreme ups and down.

Let's start with the Fanclub Launch.
An 'exclusive' party for a 'selected few'.
Well.. yeah rite.
It's ok. I don't want to talk about it.
But whatever it is, that wasthe first time ever that I set my eyes on those handsome group of guys..especially..you know who.

The Dining with Peterpan cum Press Conference @ Lawry's wasn't any better.
What's up with the super tight security?
There was like only 20 fans..
Even the restaurant's management were unhappy with the way things turned out.
But whatever lah eh.. at least I got to eat good food. Heheheh..

I guess the best part was the show @ HRC.
1 and half hour of standing right infront of ARiel..singing my heart out... and ogling @ him of course. He looks hot on tv but extremely delicious in real life. It took me all my willpower not to jump on him.

The best, power-packed show I've ever watched. Worth my $150. Although the organisers should learn their acronyms.. what does VIP means, people?? Let's say it together.. VERY IMPORTANT PEEPS. Well, I don't feel very important that day despite holding the VIP tics. You made us line up for 1 n half hour while looking @ all these kaum puaks walked in..I bet they didnt even buy any tics. Luckily i was still in the front row of the stage..or else... jaga korang.. aku mintak balik duit aku.

THe best part was of course.. the MOS.
Tak yah citer banyak2 pasal tu.
Siapa2 yang tau..tau lah.. Yang tak tau..tak yah tau.
Thank you to Huda and Ciwok.
Terasa jugak lifestyle the rich and famous ni.
Masuk club tak yah bayar..tak yah line up.
Suma orang pandang.
Bestnyer.

I survived! I slept alone! Not in the staff room; that would have been too creepy, but in my homeroom. Unrolled the sleeping back right at the back of the class, dumped my bag and my cushion, baring and ta-daaa...I slept.

Ok fine, that sounds too easy.
The truth is, I waited all the way till 430 to sleep.
I surfed the net.
And even when I decided to sleep, I peeked thru my window and noticed that a group of my leaders were sitting right under my window chatting.
And I calmed myself by saying that Siak Hong is sleeping in the staff room alone and with the lights off.
And that it's Aszrina's class that's haunted, not mine.
And I switched on ERA, (which played damn good songs, I tell you) all the way till morning.
And yup, the lights were on too all the way.
But hey! Give me a litle credit ok.
I did sleep alone after all.
In the huge classroom.
Forever opening my eyes and half expecting that odd pair of legs between the kaki kerusi.

But, I'm still proud of myself.
Hwee Kiang and Cik Maznah told me yesterday that I was very brave to want to sleep alone. Heheheh...
And I do feel brave. Now, at least.
But please, the next camp..let me have a female partner!
Al least during the Malay camp I got to sleep with Asz who was as scared as I was.
And even when I couldnt sleep, I could drag all the female student leaders to sleep with me without feeling embarrased.

I think my cadets are back.
I was too sleepy to follow them go for their morning jog.
I think I mumbled something that I couldnt even understand when one of the boys woke me up and asked me if I wanted to accompany them.

S0..6 more hours to go yeah.
I'll just clean up the mess in my class.
The school is such a lovely place to be in when its the hols.
The conclusion to my hating school: The kids.
But thats not true.
I love my kids..at least 80% of them.
then why do i hate going to school so much?
I dont think its because of planning the lessons because here I am sambil2 plan lessons and I'm enjoying it.
i think its more to the waking up at freaking 5am part.
Yup, thats it. I hate waking up early.
My new conclusion why I hate school so much: The waking up early part. It gets me cranky every single weekday.

The headache is here again.
And my eyes hurt.
And I'm bored to death in the staff room, waiting for tomorrow to come so that I can finally leave the camp.
I hate camps.
Especially when you are the only teacher around and you have no one else to talk to.
Lucky for me, Hwee Kiang's here.
But I guess she'll leave for home soon.
And I'll still be here.
And another question that's been bugging me: Who am I going to sleep with tonite?
I've never even slept alone in my own room before, how do u expect me to sleep alone in the staff room??!

I feel extremely blessed to have Shahreil.

I hate being sick..especially durng holidays.
What a waste.

I'm leading a blissful life right now.
No work.
Waking up as late as I want to. (thou I always wake up at 7.30 because I'm so used to waking up very early)
Sitting down down nothing.
Going out as often as I want to.
Watching as many dvds as I want to.
This is heaven.
Thou I feel unproductive sometimes and am itching to do something.
Like plan lessons, or go to school and clean up the mess at my workspace or my class, or give Amira and Mahathir their much needed tuition, or clean up my room, or set common tests...th list is endless. I remember seeing this poster at Holiday Inn Batam, which says something like..Perfecting the Art of Doing Nothing. Hahha.. I need to learn that art. I guess, most of us Sporeans are like that. We are so used to woking and working and working our ass off that when we really do not have anything to do, we get restless. Like I am right now.

So..what shall I do today?
a) Clean up the room.
b) movie date

Tomorrow?
a) Go tokne's house, maybe

Had the most wonderful week.
Malacca trip with my sec 2s was fun.
Kampung Sri Tanjung was so beautiful.
Picture perfect really.
I know that when I've retired, I will have a house like those in Kampung Sri Tanjung.
Very traditional yet very pretty.
We had fun rubber tapping, basket weaving, fishing.
The fishing part was the best.
Jangan kata budak2, cikgu2 pun macam jakun tak pernah mengail ikan.

The kArimun trip with the cikgu-cikgus lagi best.
Funny to see them so jakun about so many things.
The bus oplek, the throwing of litter anywhere we felt like it, the rumah burung, the fresh air kelapa, the food..
I also realised that there is definitely more to Tg Balai then the kecoh2ness that I've always hated.
I guess Ive taken the place for granted for so many years.
I've only seen it as a stopover to Buru.
Didnt realise that there's so many historical places there.
The trip has opened my eyes, I guess.

The best part of the trip was of course..I got to stay while the rest went back to Singapore!
Yippeee!!! Daddy didnt know that I planned to stay of course.heheh..
And everyone in Buru helped me tricked him into thinking that I stayed in Balai and not Buru.
Thank you, all..
But of course, I told him the truth when I reached home. =)
I still can't believe that I went to Buru by myself.
But I did it. And I'm definitely going to do it again..soon.

And after the wonderful trip,
I made the conclusion that Buru is still my favourite place.
It may be so kampung with the sampah and the smell and the pasir and the not so equipped toilets. But I love it anyway.
I'm happiest when I'm there.
What can be more perfect than being at the beach, sipping fresh coconut juice, with thousands and thousands of stars in the sky, listening to a group of budak2 kampung with their guitars singing Peterpan songs? Sometimes the happiness I felt is so great that I get sad, cos I know that tomorrow will still come and I will still have to come back to Spore and back to all the shitty realities. And those guys will still be there every single nite singing away happily. Damn.

I miss Buru Already.

This is the hardest week of my working life.
I have to drag myself out of bed and out of the house every morning.
I think about getting MC every day.
It is no consolation that this week is afterall the last week.
I still dread going to work.

2 more days to go Yati.
2 more days and you are out of here.
2 more days.

and there will be the
a) Malacca trip with the sec 2s (this should be fun)
b) Nike Joga thingy this Sunday @ National Stadium(I think I should come down to support my kids: Helmi+Razie+Nick, Radzlee+Iderus+Khairi, Nadia+Amanda+Nazurah)
c) Karimun trip
d) Batam trip again (hopefully)
e) endless tv programmes (yippppeee)
f) waking up after 10am (yeah)

this is life.
But meanwhile, I still have to go through the 2 days..

First and foremost, I'd like to wish my darling Shahreil a
very Happy 7th Year Anniversary!

Everything was splendid.
Starting with the fact that my school decided to grant us a holiday yesterday.
Can you imagine, of all the days that the P could choose from, she chose YESTERDAY, 18th May 2006 as a holiday. Which was of course perfect for me.

I was lazing around at home when Diyana shouted from downstairs, asking me to come down. And what do I see? A bouquet of flowers! Heheh.. Shahreil knows that I LOVE flowers. I'm a total sucker for them. Especially those that come in nice ribbons and wrappings. And being the sweetheart that he is, he sents me flowers almost all the time. And I not only love the flowers that he sent me yesterday, I also love whats written in the card that came with the flowers.

Last year, we had cable car dining, which was totally romantic. This year, we thought of renting a yacht, but apparently, Marina Sea Sports does not update its website regularly, so the info we've got abt the yacht was wrong. Damn.
But its ok, we had fun.. at a much cheaper rate. Heheh..
We went kayaking. And it was so fun.
I can't wait to go kayaking with Shahreil again.

The best part was, the food.
First time at Straits Kitchen.
I was so full..in fact, I'm still full right now, more than 12 hours later.
Tapi best lah.. first time I ate Buddha Jumps Over the Wall.
Hahahha...I remember watching this Stephen Chow's movie where there was a whole bg deal about cooking the best Buddha Jumps Over the Wall..and I wanted so much to sample the dish. I got my wish yesterday.

I love you Shahreil bin Bakri.
Thank you for loving me the past 7 years.
And I'm looking forward to spending many more years with you.

Here I am, in front of the laptop.
I've spent the last 2 hours typing in conduct grades and remarks for my frm class.
Now, I'm having a bad headache and my eyes hurt like hell.

But, put that aside.
I want to talk about good things.
My family trip to Batam.

It was a terrific trip.
3 cheers to Ikin for planning the much needed trip.
Everything was perfect.
I loved everything about the hotel that we stayed in.
The suite, the view, the food, the pool, the customer service. EVERYTHING.
3 cheers for Holiday Inn.

I loved the shopping @ MegaMall & DCMall.
It beats shopping in Spore.
At least, I don't have to feel guilty about buying so many things at one time.
At least, I don't have to worry whether I have enough money at the end.
And of course, once again, the customer service is tops.
Number 1.
@Choconutz, the staffs actually rushed down and suprised us with a cake when we wanted to celebrate Amira's Bday + Mummy's Day.
Imagine our suprise.
And everone actually came over to shake hands with the bday girl to congratulate her.
I've never received that kind of treatment in Spore.

And of course.
Indo guys are sizzling hot.
I met an Ariel look-alike at Point Break.
I nearly fainted.

Hahahah..
Shall we go again?
Please Ikin.. This weekend??

It was supposed to be a harmless trip to Tampines Mall and then to Muzika Records @ Geylang.
I was only supposed to top up my ezlink and then buy one cd.
BUT... I ended up buying lotsa stuffs for myself! ARghhhhhHH!
I blame Ikin. She influenced me.

Not my fault that I bought 3 new tops from Metro.. (how am I supposed to just watch while she tried on tops after tops after tops)
I think my new favourite colour is green.
the 3 tops are in 3 different shades of green. To think that I used to loathe the colour.

Not my fault either that I bought some pills from Nature's Farm. NOpe, not some slimming pills.. I'm past that phase of my life where I try every single products in my attempts at shedding some weight. It's a B-complex thingy. Supposed to relieve me from fatigue or something.

Not my fault also when I bought a tankiny (is that how it's spelt??). Its like a tank top + a bikini bottom. Ikin dragged me to Sheer Romance and of course I couldnt resist those sexy little things. Neway, I needed one for our Batam trip. It's really gorgeous you know. The one that I bought was really cute. Halter top and a tiny weeny skirt. But I'd have to stay in the water when I'm wearing that, or risk getting marched back to my room by the Daddy. Mum was alright with it. I modelled it for her yesterday. She wanted to get one too.. Woooaahh.. Notti2..

I can't wait for our family trip. We need this.
Even though its just Batam. Who cares.
I don't.

The start of another week.
*sigh*

But I had a fun extended weekend.
Can't really remember what I did on Saturday.
(my memory is getting worse)
Oppss..Yup, I do remember now.
I watched soccer with the darling.
I enjoyed myself, but couldnt say the same thing about him.
His beloved Man U lost.
Not that I'm a fan of Chelsea, but I just like to support the opposing team.
Heheh..anyways, I won. And I learnt quite a bit about soccer that day.
Him explaining about the point system and relegations and bla bla bla.

Sunday was fun too.
Was expecting a day of the sand, sun and the sea.
Yeah rite, I think I spent less than 15 mins in the water.
Laut kotor lah...ada jelly fish lah..ada belangkas lah..
Damn! Suddenly I miss phi phi..or at the very least, Bintan.
And one more thing I learnt that day.
NEVER EVER shop with boys!
Boring nyer...I nearly fainted with boredom.They are worse than girls.
Satu kedai jer 45 minutes. Giler kan!
They browse and browse and browse. Nak beli, beli jer lah! Ish.

Monday, I got to wake up late.
And went to both Tok aji and then Tok Ne's house.
Spent 3.5hrs in each house. So, fair and square.
And now, I'm at least 2 kg heavier.
1kg from all the bebola kentang I lantak at rumah Tok Aji.
And the other 1kg from all the nasi and lauk dalca and ice cream that I lantak at rumah tok ne.
Now, I'm fat. Argh.

I dread each day more and more.
But I try as hard as I could to perk myself up.
I'm looking forward to:

a) meeting shahreil tmr
b) no meeting on Fri (school preparing for election, so everyne must leave before 2pm!)
c) the other holiday next fri
d) pay day
e) batam trip with family during the next long weekend
f) trip to Malaacca with my sec 2s
g) trip to Tg Balai with cikgu2 melayu
h) trip to BURu!!!!!! Yeahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!! Daddy, please don't stop me from going there. I need the trip so much.
i) June holidays! yeaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

2 reasons why I haven't been bloggong lately:

a) PC at home decided to mogok
b) Too much work to actually blog in school.

Tetapi, atas permintaan adik sedaraku yang tersayang..here I am.

Well, I've been busy (what's new)
Last week was totally hectic. Hiking at MacRitchie with my NPCC cadets on Friday afternoon, then rushing off to meet Shahreil for that wonderful suprise at Victoria Theatre and then Sports Day on Saturday morning (which means, there goes half of my weekend)
But, somehow I did enjoy myself.
Tiring as it was, I felt good after the long hike.
And thou I was cursing under my breath while changing from my sweaty and smelly sports gear to something more presentable in the tiny weeny cubicle in VicToria T's toilet, I did have a wonderful time. I was laughing so hard that I totally forgot how tired I was.
Sports Day was fun, as always. And of coz..Genghis won again this year. 4th year as champions. Woooohooo..

I've been thinking.
Ever since I started working, I haven't been doing things that I used to love doing.
It's like I've been sucked into this entirely different world.
And I've grown into an entirely different person.

Things that I miss:

a) cooking
b) aerobics
c) being alone in my room
d) writing letters/emails to Shahreil
e) buying simple inexpensive prezzies for Shahreil
f) receiving letters from Shahreil
g) travelling all the way to BB to suprise Shahreil
h) going to Tok Ne's house
i) baking
j) taking long bus rides with Shahreil
k) spending quality time with MYSELF and not be thinkng about work all the time
l) being light hearted

In just 3 years, things changed.
And now I feel like crying.
And Shahreil will say, it's the hormones talking.
But he is so wrong.

Have a million things to do that at times like this, I feel as though 24 hours in a day is NOT enough.
I've got 2 piles of karangan, 1 kefahaman, 1 buku kerja to mark.
It's not that complaining cos to tell you the truth, I love marking.
I think, one of the reason I'm in this profession is because i've always wanted to mark books.

Neways, the thing I have to complete today(hopefully):
a) finish marking
b) print all sec 4 n 5 mid year papers.
c) prepare tomorro's lesson

Sounds simple, but trust me, it's not.
Looks like I'm staying back late again today.
But the boys are coming to my homeroom today, so I guess
they'll keep me entertained with their antics while I do my work.

And.. to my dearest, Happy 6 yrs 11 mths Anniversary.
Can't wait to see to today.
Love you lot lot.

Have you ever felt that somehow, you don't really belong in this place, time and era?
Cos I'm feeling it again right now.
Here I am marking comprehension while listening to malay songs.
Nope, not Siti Nurhaliza or Ziana Zain kind of malay songs.
But the old ones.. classic.
The ones that you hear when you watch the black and white malay films.
Yup..those ones. The ones that will cause my students to groan and try to switch to some reggae cds.

Anyways..here I am listening to Noraniza Idris and Abdullah Chik,
and suddenly I start wishing that I'm in that kind of era..
you know..the ones that has pendekars and all.
Hahah.. I know it's crappy.
But was watching Lela Satria with Diyana last night, and let me tell you..
the guys looked fabulously hot with their samping and tanjak and keris..
I think I'd be one sexed up bitch if I was born in that era. =P

Well, maybe all these fantasies of living in some other time and place is brought
about my general dissatisfaction with life.
Maybe yes. Maybe not.
Whatever it is, let me drift into my fantasy world once in a while

What a wonderful weekend.
2 whole days of shopping, gossipping, eating and more shopping!
First with adik n yan at Bugis.
Then with Ikin, who shocked me by blowing off more than $300
on makeup and shoes and clothes in one single afternoon! (I'm supposed to be
the spendthrift in the family!)
Then the next day with Ikin and Tiot, shopping AGAIN!
No regrets though. Felt really wonderful after that.
We felt like Paris Hilton on a shopping spree.
Wooohhoooo..

Neways, the babes made a pact while busy gentel-ing bagedil
yesterday.
When each of us receive our CPF, we will:

a) Me: Fly the rest to ALmalfi Coast (I'm only payong for the air tickets ok!)
Tiot: Bawak kitorang pergi Haji (Lepas bermaksiat di Amalfi, kita beribadah)
Ikin: Spa PAckage at Dubai
Diyana: Ermm... yang ini agak tidak pasti kerana dia adalah seorang MEL (melukut di tepi gantang)

SO, yup.. INSYALLAH, moga panjang umur dan dimurahkan rezeki kami-kami ini.

Was browsing through someone's blog.. a fellow teacher, and came upon this quote:
A hundred years from now it will not matter what my bank account was, the sort of house I lived in, or the kind of car I drove.. but the world may be different because I was important in the life of a child- Kathy Davis.

Wow. It was so inspirational. The kind of words I needed sometimes to perk me up, to remind me that what I'm doing now is worthwhile after all. All the hard work, the sweat, the migrane, the hurt, the tears are all for a reason.

I think I'm the most kental 20-something Malay woman in Singapore.
I listen to dangdut for goodness sake.
And dont forget New Boyz.
But dangdut is still tops.
Kental.Kental.Kental.
But it makes me happy.
It makes me smile.
It makes me feel like dancing and singing.
And most important of all, it makes my day A whole
lot better. Maybe not better. But at least i FEEL better.

Thank you Inul, Rhoma Irama, VettyVera n Hetty Koes Endang
for making me smile every single day.

Someone's getting promoted..Heheheh..

I've always love cooking.
It's something I enjoy doing.
More often than not, I eat NOT because
I feel like eating, but because I feel like
cooking.

When I was younger, I used to cook
for my siblings.
Both my parents would be in the room, leaving us
infront of the telly watcing some late night movie..
and I'll be itching to whip up something from the kitchen.
Usually, my dad would come down the stairs as he could
smell the the aroma frm the kitchen.

But since I've started working, I realise that I cook lesser and lesser.
No time..no energy. The same old story from a working person in Spore.
ANd lately, Í miss cooking.
SO, during the weekend, I had this strong urge to look for
my huge recipe book..the one that I used during SEc3-4 Food n Nutrition classes.
My fav recipe book whereby nothing could go wrong.
Was so delighted to have found it stashed in the cabinet.

Thus, over the weekend, I baked a totally YUMMY pineapple crumble
for the sibs and the fiance.
YEaaaHHH! The old me is back..

Evrything's getting to be so mundane.
And I'm getting so numb inside.

In my new staff room.
I don't really like it here though.
Miss my own lil cosy corner.
Never mind..I'll scoot off to my homeroom
which is way cosier than this place.

I've got two more tasks to undertake.
First, I'm in charge of this new programme called,
"I Love to Work". Its a scheme for the needy pupils
in my school. Well, the VP will be meeting me any day now
to actually tell me what it's all about.

Second, I'm starting a sepak takraw team for my Sec1 ML boys.
I'm pretty excited about it.
I've talked to the VP/HOD CCA and all.
They've given me the green light and I've already
emailed PERSES and evry other sepak takraw teams in Spore
looking for a coach thats willing to coach for free.

I think I'm a whole lot strnger person now.
After the camp, I somehow feel as though I'm capable of
doing pretty much everything thats thrown my way.
In my 3 years of teaching, I've organised 2 school assembly prog,
1 ML Week, 1 Camp brought students out for seminars/workshops blas bla..
Now, I go , More Work? Bring it on..

Just came back from a day trip to Batam.
Me and the other babes had a wonderful wonderful time there.

Wanted to go to Mustika Ratu for a day of pampering.
Pedicure, manicure, hair treatment, massage, bath -- the works.
But Tiot's having her period and she didnt want to just watch while
the rest of us soak in the tub.
In the end, we went to a hair salon at Batam Centre.
It was freakingly cheap! A hair treatment that usually set me back
by $45 just cost me $7 today. Can you believe that!
The four of us stepped out of the salon feeling like gorgeous artistes
without having to burn a hole in our pockets.
Well, I'll definitely head to Batam more often.

And of cos, the spaghetti at Pizz Hut that cost only about $2++
Kita pon apa lagik, mencekik muntah kedarah lah. Ish~

Well, it doesnt seem so bad that daddy wnt allow me to ever set foot on
Buru again (afraid that I'll go running into the arms of Kuswadichandra Kelana
Putra since he now has a future son-in-law which he thinks so highly of)I can now go to Batam.

Hey! I'm back!
Kem Bahtera IV was a blast.. (I can say that now. Heheh)
It was a totally stressful, exhausting yet enriching experience
for me.
For those of you who doesnt know, this year, I'm the i/c for
our yearly Sec 1 Malay Language Camp.
It used to be Tetty.. and I'd just come during the camp lazing
around..heheh..
But since Tetty has moved on to much greener pastures.. The burden has
been heaped onto my shoulders.. And what a burden it was!
Just ask Shahreil.. how many times I'd cry and whine and curse and cry
again because of the camp. And dun forget the headaches that I have to endure.
BUT HEY!!! I DID it!!!! And I'm feeling totally proud of myself.
I deserve a treat. Maybe I'll go treat myself later, or head of to Buru tomorrow. Hahahha..


Well..what I've learnt from the camp.
a) Budak-budak sekarang manja nak mampos.
The Sec 1 campers irritate me by their lembik-ness and manja-ness.
SEriously. THis boy who cried for so many different reasons during the camp actually
cried when he watched PONTIANAK MENJERIT! YESH!!!! PONTIANAK MENJERIT! It's a bloddy comedy!!!! What the hell. Another boy CRIED because he was having fever. HUH???? And another girl made her dad came all the way in a cab to fecth her home at 4 am in the morning because she complained of chest pains. And the reason for that, she told me, was because her mum is not around. WHATTTT???!!!

b) I really love my sec 3 student leaders.
They were my pillars of strength throughout this whole experience.
My overall camp ICs: Elly and Fauzi who stayed back many afternoons to help me plan and plan and plan. And who really ran the whole show. Fauzi exceeded my expectations
MY Group Leaders: Who were more excited than the sec 1s. Sorry for the 'lecture. Heheheh.
And the rest who totally blew me away. Guys who I reluctantly included in the camp but turned out to be so helpful and dependable and FUN!
Dzul... I see him a different light now.

I had fun. And i hope you guys did too.

Saw Hadi and Arsyad in the bus yesterday.
How they've grown up to be very fine young men.
My first batch of students.. 14 year old boys
at that time. Now they are 17. How time flies.
Can't help feeling proud that they are now
tertiary students. Big guys like that calling me
cikgu..haahahahha...Feel old.

I feel like a mother bird. Getting all emotional when the little ones
grow and leave the nest.

I'm totally exhausted.
So exhausted that I slept at 9 pm last nite.
And I woke up still feeling a teeny weeny bit
sleepy.

There's like a million things to do.
Thats one thing I hate about the end of the term.
Rushing to tabulate marks, key in form students'marks,
print result slips, call parents, meet parents, and the
list goes on and on.
Worse, the MT teachers are being moved to a new staff room,
so i have to start packing my stuffs, and I'm i/c of Kem BAhtera
this year and I'm trying to form a sepak takraw team for my
sec 1 boys and I have yet to really decorate my MT homeroom and my form
class home room. BUT, I've already engaged the services of 2 Scouts
to decorate n clean up my homeroom. Hehehheh... One thing settled here.

Wish me luck for Kem Bahtera.

And yeah, whenever things seems really bad, I close
my eyes and imagine I'm in Buru (my favouritest place in
the world) I think of sitting by the beach, sipping coconut juice
and listening to dangdut and that'll bring a smile to my face.
Once i open my eyes, I realise I'm still stuck here.
But at least, I have a few seconds of happiness each day.
Thanks to my wise guy, Mr Shahreil, for that very
much needed advice. (although i'm sure he didnt mean
Buru when he gave me that piece of advice!)

For the past few weeks,
I've been losing sleep
over Kem Bahtera.
This year, I'm the lucky one
who gets the opportunity to
organise the camp. I knew all
along that was coming.

I hate organising big events
like this. There's a thousand
things to do and there's always this
possibility that I'm goin to fuck things
up.
BUT, seeing how enthusiastic my Sec 3
student leaders are.. just make things better
for me. I'm depending on you guys!
We'll have a blast this coming March holidays.

Accompanied my mum for a facial.
Needed one for myself, badly.
Pimples all over my forehead due to stress+pms.
And it felt wonderful to be pampered.
Thanks mum.

Just finished cleaning up my room.
Feel so much better after all the
tidying, sweeping, dusting, mopping.
Now my room is squeaky clean.
Bagus Yati bagus...

The birthday girl is missing.
Everyone is clueless as to where
she is.
Someone said maybe she's off
shopping at Batam. Another said
maybe she's off to her sewing class.
And someone strongly believes that
she's at Vanilla for a facial.
She doesnt pick up her hp..most probably
that hp is on silent mode and is still
at home anyway..

IBU!!! Pergi mana?????
Ermm.. maybe she and daddy have a secret
birthday date... ahem ahem..

Saturday

Half my saturday was wasted at PA.
Had to accompany my NPCC girls for their
campcraft competition. YUP. You read it
correctly. I'm in NPCC now. Kind of miss my hockey girls
and I still think I'm not the NPCC kind of girl.
Still have to go for that training in December.
DAMN. Thinking of ways to get out of NPCC before
that.

Another half of my day spent walking around TM and Century
Square with Ikin. It's mummy's bday tomorrow.
Wanted to buy this nice watch, but we had doubts abt it.
Lancome Cosmetic Set, but ikin didnt like the gift bag that
comes along with it. A perfume(some French sounding name)
that Tiara Jacquelina wears, but it doesnt have that WOW
factor. A necklace..but no WOW factor either. So, in the end,
we bought this nice Bonia handbag that we are confident mummy will
love. Thou dad will kill us cos he hinks mum has too many bags already.
Me and Ikin prmise to get mum this another really gorgeous Bonia bag
once we have enuff dough to spare.

Happy Advance Birthday Mummy Dearest.
*MUAHHZ*

I'm halfway through this book entitled Jakarta Undercover.
Real life accounts by an Indonesian journalist who offers
us a glimpse of the modern and urban Jakarta and its unlimited
sexual services.
I've learnt quite a lot so far... Sashimi sex, Squeals on Wheels
NHS.
Its actually quite scary.
I mean, I know such things exist. But to actually reall read it
is a totally different thing from hearsays n gossips.
And to think that it's not something thats happening in the west,
but right here at our doorstep (hey! Indo and Spore NOT that far rite?)
terrifies me.
Like what my mom always say..dah nak akhir zaman.

It's been a terrible week for me.
Work was piling. I got arrowed
to do so many things, the main reason
they usually give, "you are young,
energetic, creative , bla bla bla.."
Just to butter you up and make you feel
better about the upcoming task.

I nearly had a breakdown.
My head hurts from the headache.
And I was about to slide back to
my pessimistic/unhappy self.
Lucky for me, I have Shahreil
who's always there to provide
me with the encouragement and support
that I need.
The one with the sound advice.

I feel blessed to have him by my side.
Thank you, love.

The headache is not going away.

Brats

It's confirmed.
Teenagers nowdays are pampered brats.
Especially those in this country.

Just hear what the kids in my school whine about:

The school is lousy (hey! YOU made it lousy!)
No air-conditioned classrooms (the fees you pay do NOT
even cover the monthly electricity bills!)
Why homeroom system? (YOU got restless sitting in the
same class the whole day)
Why NO midyear exams? (only last year you complained
about having midyear exams!)
Wny no more school library?(how many times last year
did you even stepped into the library?! I bet not more than twice!)
Why make you stay in detention class till 3.30?
(who asked you to be a perpetual latecomer?!
Why no swimming pool? (huh? are you mistaking this place
for a country club?!
Why no skate park? Why so many homeworks? Why lessons
so boring? Why Why WHY????!!!!!!

If it's up to me, I'll pack all thes brats to a
third world country. No fun team-building, leadership
kind of orientation camps.
To the poor and starving country you'll go.
And learn to appreciate things more.
And not be brats.
SPOILT!SELF-CENTRED BRATS!

Vday

I've got a splitting headache right now.
That happens whenever I have tons of
books and test papers to mark.
I love marking, but sometimes it just
gets to me that the marking is never ending.
You finish 1 pile, you get another almost
right away.

Anyways, received a few presents for Valentine
yesterday.
A heart shaped balloon, a heart-shaped paper,
a stalk or rose and a cute little teddy bear.
All from my dearies in school.
Shahreil gave me a stak of rose, courtesy of
Fish n Co. Gave me RELUCTANTLY, if i may add.
He was embarrased that we walked around
Suntec holding a rose. I was too.
Valentine is just not for us. We have our own
special dates to celebrate.

That's all.
I still have that stupid headache.
And yeah... I don't think I'm going Batam
this weekend.
Damn.

Ariel

I'm getting a little bit too obsessed
with Peterpan..or Ariel, to be more
specific.

Hope I'll still get to catch their
concert in Batam.
My siblings having second thoughts
considering its in Indo and you know how
they are like at concerts. I dun wanna
get crushed just to get a glimpse
of Ariel. But I really wanna go.
*sigh*

How..?

Mimpi Yang Sempurna

Another purrfect weekend.
Su (Ikin's friend from KL) stayed over
and I had a great time playing host.
I kind of miss the endless and mindless
chatter, giggles and laughters.

We went to Batam on Sat and we shopped
and shopped and shopped.
I went crazy at Mega Mall.
And the fact that Peterpan's song was played
over and over again in the mall.
And everything was ridiculously cheap.
And I was surrounded by Indon guys
who never fail to make me swoon and drool.
The bestest part is... we found out that PETERPAN is
coming to BATAM this coming Saturday. ARGHHHHHHH!!!!
They are holding a concert at the stadium.
FINALLY, I can meet Ariel!
ARGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm so goin to faint from all these excitement.

Batam, we'll meet again in 6 days time.
Ariel, I'll see YOU in 6 days time.
Hehehe..

Meanwhile, I'll just watch your videoclip.

Miss You

Less than a week and I'm already missing
my cousins. I need another gathering FAST!
Well, looks like we have to wait till Tiot has
another off day on the weekends.

But I miss US.

The best thing about teaching is that there's
never a boring day at work.
Exhausting, yes.
Stressful , definitely.
But not boring. Never ever.

My Monday

It's one of the better Mondays for me.
Work was fine, minus the sore throat part.
But no Monday blues for me.

It was hard waking up, as usual.
But I remembered Shahreil telling me
that we enjoy during weekends, so weekdays
are for us to work.
Seems fair enough.
So I was happily doin my work throughout
the day, knowing that I had fun for the past
2 days and come Saturday, I WILL have fun again.

Work doesnt seem half as bad when you look
at it in a positive manner.
Thank you dear, for the very wise advice.

Another gathering @ East Coast for the cuzzies.
The gift exchanging session was so fun.
I was laughing so hard that my stomach
actually hurts.

Too bad Lukman had to leave early.
He missed our CSI game.

The best part, they are all right here
in my house, watching dvd.
We are having a pyjama party tonite!
Yipppeeeee.....

Let's go to Seoul..

Went to Seoul Garden with
Shahreil and the rest of the gang.
But I had blocked nose and the only
way to breathe was through my mouth
so that took like half of the enjoyment away.
Icouln't really taste my food and so it was quite
pointless. I was just stuffing stuffs down my
throat, trying to make it worth my (or rather,
Shahreil's) $22.
But it was still fun.

And before that, Shahreil suprised me by
bringing me to EC where we just sat and
took lots of pics. Simple fun.

Pengumuman

Pengumuman buat adik-adik saudaraku
yang jembu-jembu & hansem-hansem belaka.
Jangan lupa temujanji kita untuk berpesta
di EC pada Ahad ini.

Senarai nama mengikut peringkat umur:

1) Nurhayati a.k.a Along
2) Nurfatiah a.k.a Prebet Tiot
3) Nurashikin a.k.a Ikin Tanky
4) Nurdiyana a.k.a Psycho
5) Lukman Hakim a.k.a Budak 'Khatam'
6) Iryani
7) Aishah
8) Nuraini
9) Nadia
10) Nurul Huda
11) Irsyad

Kanak-kanak Budu yang boleh diajak sama:

12) Nuramira
13) Mahathir
14) Syakir
15) Izuddin ( No political stories, kiddo!)

Jangan lupa bawa hadiah yang berharga
tidak lebih drp $5 & berwarna merah.
(Siapa yang tak bawa hadiah tu, leh dok one
corner biler kita tukar-tukar prezen)

Untuk sebarang pertanyaan, sila
hubungi tuan pengurus, iaitu
Cik Nurashikin Mohd.

Someone complained and threatened
to majok if I do not thank him for
Sunday's event.

So here it goes:
I'd like to thank my darlingest Shahreil
for the loveliest Soo Kee bling bling that's now
on my finger. It's exactly what I've
always wanted for an engagement ring.
I can't stop staring at it and my colleagues
can't stop gushing about how lovely it is.

I love you.

Baik Punya Cilok was hilarious.
But I cringed every time Shahreil laughed.
His laughters were so loud that it embarrassed me, as usual.
Hehehe.. sorry dear.

A beautiful day

I figure I should be blogging
a little abt my engagement.

Well.. everything went as planned.
A little hiccups here and there..
but alhamdulillah..it's all
over.

It was an amazing experince.
Though I kept saying that
I'd rather not go through
all that hassle ever again,
I kind of like it..hehehe..

The biggest thank you to
my parents, who I believe,
had to go through hell to
please both their children and their
siblings. Well, to cut a long story short,
we had our own little argument on how
things should be down for the engagement.
It must have been difficult for my parents
being sandwiched like that.

Next, to my siblings. My personal manager,
Ikin, who had to take the crap from my
aunties and uncles for speaking up for me
about how i wanted things to be done.
And for taking care of all the little things
that I did not want to be bothered with.
To Diyana who spent days moving furniture
around and putting up with my tantrums.
To Aini who suprisingly did not even grumble when
made to carry things up and down the stairs.
To Amira n Mahathir..ermm..for being there.

To my darling cousins.
Prebet Tiot who slept over since Thursday,
sacrificing her much needed rest, walkin
all around Bedok with me and Ikin to buy
stuffs for the hantaran.
Lukman, for being the chauffer of the day,
Nurul, for snapping pictures.
Abg Khairil for smsing even when he cldnt
make it to the ceremony.
To all the little ones who just upped the kecohness
in the house.

To my aunts and uncles
who contributed their time and energy.
Pak Long n Mak Long for the yummy food.
Cik Niah for the bunga rampai
Cik Anip n Cik Milah for rushing to Mustafa Centre
on Sat night when they heard we could get fruits
for the hantaran.
Mak Long Fati for the kuih bakar.
Cik Ina n Cik Amat for the delicious looking cake.
Cik Jah who took mc just to come on Sunday.
Cik Mal and Cik NAh for the kek lapis.
And the rest of the Mokhtar n Ibrahim clans
whose very presence meant so much to me.

To my grandparents.
Tok Aji and Nenek.
Tok Ne, who slept over for the very first time!

Not forgetting Tok Ju from Buru who bertungkus
lumus cuci periuk.
And Mbak Yu who did her work silently in the kitchen.

And I forgot, to mom, who spent 2 days straight sewing my
beautiful cadar.

It's a new chapter for me and my ehem.. fiance..
Heheheh..

Backstreet's Back! *scream*

I want to start by saying,

"Nick! I Love YOUuuuuuu!!!!!"

I've been waiting for the Backstreet Boys to hold a concert here in Singapore for years.. 10 bloody freaking years to be exact.
So there I was yesterday at Singapore Indoor Stadium screaming my heart and lungs out.
I still can't believe that I was in the same room as BSB.. even thou they were like 200metres away.
Who cares. I don't.
Gosh, i couldnt describe the feeling when BSB was about to come onto the stage.
I had goosebumps all over me. Berdiri bulu roma beb!
Suddenly I was 16 all over again. Jumping and dancing and screaming and singing. With no worry in the world.

I'm glad they sang their old songs quite a bit.
The only bummer...where was my Get Down?!
I waited and waited for that song. Damn.

I'm on a high right now.
I can't stop singing BSB songs.
Gonna buy their Never Gone Tour DVD.
And i'l start searching for my old BSB Concert in Germany vcd.
Havent watched that for years now.

Trivia:
(a) In which magazine did Yati first saw & fell in love with Nick Carter?
(b) What was Yati's dream in year 1996?
(c) List down Yati's fav BSB members from most to least.
(d) Which friend in JC shared the same passion about BSB as Yati?


Answer:
(a) Lime Magazine
(b) Marry Nick Carter and live in a small house by the beach that is white and sandy. I'll be wearing a white, flowy, cottony-like dress, walking hand in hand with Nick. Hehehe.... Hey! A girl CAN dream, right!
(c) Nick, Brian, Kevin, AJ, Howie
(d) Jessica frm YJC (the president of our-never-opened-BSB-fanclub. were you there yesterday Jessie?? I miss YOU!)

Kampung girl

I think I don't belong here.
I want to live in a kampung.
Shahreil says that the grass is always greener at the other side.
But I dunno.
How come I feel so strongly about this?
I was watching Haryati at Suria and once again I'm overwhelmed by this feeling that I don't belong in the city.

I Need to Stop and BREATHE.

It's been the most hectic 3 weeks of my teaching life.
And the problem is, I really don't know why.
In terms of teaching, the hours been cut down.
I like have 1 hour periods instead of the original 1 n half.
But somehow I'm just so busy.
My guess is, the admin work.
I'm a form teacher this year and I've never realise the amount of things that you need to do as a form teacher. Its never ending.

Check attendance, call parents when student not in school, call parents when students came in late, call parents when students skip class, students looking for you every minute of the day because they need this and that, enter their attendance/late-comin/offences in the school cockpit.
Like I said, it's never ending.

I'm exhausted. My legs will give way anytime soon.
I reach home everyday only to be stuck infront of the PC doing more work.
And I cant sleep well at night, forever having nighmares about school thus, taking away my well deserved rest.
I will wake up half an hour before the alarm because I dread hearing the stupid alarm.

Im tired. Tired. Tired.
Was so tired that I couldnt get out of bed to meet SHahreil today.
There I was at 430pm, sleeping in a sitting position because I was afraid that I'd fall asleep, which I did of course.
I woke up to his call at 445 and thou I was aching to meet him, I couldnt move a muscle.

Im tired.

On a more positive note, a guy that I had a crush way back during my tpjc years just messaged me at friendster.
He said I'm a babe now. Hahahah..
I would have fainted and died of heart atttack if he had said that like 8 years back.
But now, I just smile to myself.

My Pride and Joy

I was at the Sec 1 orientation camp today.
The school was buzzing with activities... since all the CCAs set up booths and stations to attract potential members.

As I was busy selecting students for my hockey team, I couldnt help but notice the seniors running the various activities.
And suddenly my heart was bursting with pride.
I mean..Qayyum, Izuan, Helmi and Hairul in their NCC uniforms looking so smart and strong.
Shakilla, the once quiet and geeky student with specs now a student leader.
Elly, coaching the Sec 1s netball.

All these kids whom I taught in Sec 1 all grown up.
And I was part of that growing up process.

Even though I'm constantly being disappointed by students whom I tried to help but ended up losing along the way...there are others who fill me with pride and joy.
And I'd like to thank them for helping me not to lose faith in my job.
And help me believe that I still can make a difference in someone's life. No matter how small.

Happy Birthday, Lukman!

We tricked Lukman into entering Singapore so that we could throw him a suprise birthday party at East Coast Park. It was supposed to be a small and simple affair, but the number of people increased from the initial 5 to 10!

The gorgeous babes:
Me, Ikin, Diyana, Tiot, Yani n Nadia.

The not-so-little boys:
Izuddin n Shakir

The friend:
Faizal (I think)

The birthday boy:
Lukman Hakim

It was a totally fun night out for us sisters, cuzzies and second cuzzies(?).
Armed with satay, beef steak, maggi goreng and of course, a birthday cake..we settled by the beach and had a huge feast.

We laughed and laughed and laughed till my head felt a little dizzy from all these happiness. Only a few a hours before that I was all stressed up and work, but being near these people I love and had not met for a long time (Nadia n Izuddin) took all that unhappiness away.

Happy 20th Birthday to my dearest Lukman. Sometimes I look at him all grown up and good-looking, and I can't believe that THATS the boy who wore the smart mamat kind of seluar pulled all the way up to his chest (well, almost) and his well-pressed shirts buttoned till he looked like he was suffocating and invented hari raya cookies that he proudly named Hati Terguris. That was like 10 years ago.

Mind you, we've all grown old.
The oldest being..yours truly.
Tiot (25) followed closely by Ikin(23) and Diyana(22)
But we still feel like teenagers. I swear that age are just numbers now. I dun feel a day above 18.
Especially when we are together like that and act like how we always act around each other.. merepek.
Who would ever guess that one's a teacher, another a police officer and the other 'khatam-ed'.
;-P


I can't wait to have another outing like this.
I love you, peeps. A lot.

Pamper Me Please

2 hours of pampering at PS.
Never mind that it cost a bomb.
What matters is that I now feel refreshed, my hair looks great and smells heavenly.
And I love the massage too.

I feel good.

All over again..

It's only day 2 and I'm already exhausted.
Nearly had a breakdown because suddenly I have no idea what to teach my 4NA class tomorrow. It was scary (the dunno-what-to-teach part)
I hate entering the class with all these eager, expectant faces staring at me, and I have nothing to offer them.

And it's only day 2..